At last, easy to follow, concise instructions on how every parent can grow their very own couch potatoes. Parents, in order to get optimum results, start as soon as you can, when they are new little spuds. Don't let them play outside or run around. Make sure your new little spuds don't exert themselves. As they get older, encourage them to watch a lot of television, especially the shows that advertise fast food, sugary cereals, soda and snack foods. When they aren't watching television, video games are great. Rather than spending money on bicycles, roller blades, sports or equipment, you can buy tons of snacks to keep them busy while they sit around. Don't get your spuds involved in dance classes, organized sports, or other physical activities.
By the way, it is important for you to set an example for your little spuds. Teach them proper remote control techniques. Laugh at people who go to the gym, take aerobic classes, and anyone who works out regularly. When you outgrow your clothes, teach your little spuds how to order larger sizes right over the internet. Why should you waste the energy of having to actually go to a store? Spend hours surfing the net until your eyes are glazed and bloodshot.
Make a point of spending quality time with your little spuds. Not sure what to do with them? Well, a family eating contest is always great fun. And, there are unlimited possibilities....one day you can do ice cream, the next day you can do cookies....well, you get the idea.
If you follow these simple instructions, your little spuds are guaranteed to grow into couch potatoes.
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